Caped Read online

Page 9


  “I wanted to check on my brother. Make sure he’s all right.”

  Anna stroked his check. “That’s my good boy. You always look out for your little brother, don’t you?”

  Sawyer looked sheepish. “Will you be mad if I didn’t tell you something before?”

  She sat down on the floor and pulled him into her lap. “Of course not, sweetie. What is it?”

  He took a deep breath and stared down at his hands. “I think Dax tried to hurt a girl at the pool.” He told her about Dax staring with red eyes at a girl in a yellow swimsuit and that she’d nearly hit her head on the diving board. “That’s when he started slapping his eyes, just like he did after he . . . after Dad got hurt. You don’t think Dax would hurt me, do you?”

  Anna tried to keep the horror off of her face as her stomach clenched and she fought to keep down last night’s dinner.

  “Mommy won’t let anything bad happen to you, baby,” she said, her voice tight. She knew what she had to do—she’d call Dr. Huxley and tell him about Dax. She had to protect Sawyer, even if she couldn’t face what that meant.

  As the first rays of light stole in through the windows in Dax’s room, Anna rocked back and forth on the floor, hugging her first born. Her eyes were closed, so she missed the grin that played at the corners of his mouth.

  Return to Contents

  LIGHT THERAPY

  Che Gilson

  To Do List

  –Pick up dry cleaning

  –Gym

  –groceries

  –Positron ray

  –Work

  –Therapy

  –Groceries (me)

  * * *

  Dr. Lumos’ Grocery List

  –milk

  –eggs

  –cheddar

  –heavy cream

  –pancake mix

  –kale

  –watercress

  –carrots

  –pot roast

  –bleach

  –sponges

  –Antibacterial hand wash

  –potato chips

  –Soda

  –1 doz. cupcakes

  * * *

  Therapy Assignment 1:

  25 things I like about myself

  1–punctual

  2–Responsible

  3–Quick reflexes

  4–Super power (heat vision)

  5–Fuck

  6–Fuck

  7–FUCK

  * * *

  To Do List

  1–sterilize lab

  2–Vacuum dining room

  3–lunch for Super League United

  1. Capt. Jackass–steak med. well

  2. Dr. Lumos–same/bigger steak

  3. Dollface–candy

  4. Fish guy–seaweed (?)

  5. Vegan bitch gets a salad

  6. Vegan bitch’s boyfriend–salad

  7. Al Whatever–Halal something (pick up at deli)

  Dessert–Italian Sand cake w/olive oil

  Vegan bitch can suck it or eat fruit

  Side kicks

  1. Me–pot roast sandwiches, homemade potato salad

  2. Carter–salad, spicy pickles, strawberry shortcake

  3. Sarah–goddamn salad

  4. Chimp–greens & fruit (goddamn salad)

  5. Wind Demon Thingie doesn’t eat?

  P.S. Burn this to–do list

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 1 cont.:

  25 things I like about myself

  5–Good cook

  6–Organized

  7–Shit

  8–Shit

  * * *

  To Do

  –clean kitchen

  –Load & empty dishwasher

  –reschedule therapy for 3rd time!

  –stake–out Lord Overdue’s HQ w/Dr.L

  –Bring turkey jerky, soda, nuts, chips, water & 3DS

  P.S. Get Wind Demon’s phone # and full name . . .

  * * *

  Therapy ass. 1 cont.:

  25 things I like about myself

  7– Am good in a fight

  8– Good host

  9– Totally kicked Overdue’s minion in the face

  10–9 & 7 are the same thing but I’m leaving it anyway

  * * *

  To Do

  –Give Carter potato salad recipe

  –Restock Dr. Lumos’ snack drawer

  –Police paperwork for Lord Overdue’s arrest

  –Therapy apptmt.

  P.S. Wind Demon’s name is ‘Sirocco’ (CAN eat but doesn’t HAVE to eat . . .)

  P.P.S. Al Hazard is mellow dude

  P.P.P.S. Burn this list

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 2:

  What things am I passionate about

  1. Cooking

  2. hosting

  3. Giving parties

  4. Going to gym?

  5. Heroics?

  6. Sirocco

  7. Sleeping?

  8. Eating?

  9. Dammit. I have no life.

  10. Video games?

  * * *

  To Do

  –Update Dr. Lumos website

  –Update my Blog

  –answer Dr. Lumos’ fanmail

  –nerve up to ask Sirocco to lunch

  –groceries me (farmers’ market tonight)

  –New food truck Crépe Crusader

  –gym

  * * *

  25 things I like about myself

  (still . . .)

  11. Competent

  12. Good at web design (but I don’t want to be, Dr. L made me take that class)

  13. Patient

  14. Easy going ? (are those the same? Also I feel like I’m getting less easy going)

  15. Good coping mechanisms (?)

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 2:

  passions

  11–cake

  12–food trucks (Crépe Crusader is amazing! And why didn’t I think of it?!?!)

  13–Food Blogging

  * * *

  To Do

  –FUCKING CALL SIROCCO U FUCKING PUSSY

  –Dr. Lumos’ grocery list

  –deli chicken

  –cheddar (sharp)

  –kale

  –carrots

  –broccoli

  –potatoes

  –bok choy

  –bean sprouts

  –snap peas

  –brisket

  –eggs

  –milk

  –sugar

  –flour

  –Positron ray (again? Just give up already)

  –Clean rat cages

  –order new lab rats

  –Find gene splicer repairman???

  –get new life

  –gym

  * * *

  Coffee date Ideas

  –places

  –Chat Noir/cozy & intimate but not too intimate

  –Pelosis’ Donuts–busy but has tables and donuts (are donuts halal?)

  –Blue Mountain–has coffee “high tea,” swank

  –The Athenian–Greek coffee but it’s a restaurant

  –Alternately, hang self in closet

  * * *

  Therapy Ass. 1:

  things I like about myself

  16. Am brave?

  17. Good in a crisis

  18. Conscientious?

  * * *

  To Do

  –Wait three days to call Sirocco back?

  –Not listen to Dr. Lumos’ dating advice?

  –Dry cleaning, pick up/drop off

  –Gene splicer tech squad will be here between 1–4

  –Reschedule therapy

  –Super League United meeting 5 pm

  –WILL SEE Sirocco there you idiot! Do NOT call back!

  –Be cool

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 2

  My passions

  11. Foodie (just reread this list–holy crap. I like food.)

  12. Nothing! I’m boring! Holy shit. E
xcept for food.

  * * *

  To Do

  –Order: rat food, petri dishes, beakers, New gene splicer AGTG 5000

  –call Dr. L’s accountant

  –Therapy

  –Dry cleaning (Dr. Lumos’ and mine)

  –laundry

  –Bug Lumos about that cleaning bot he promised me

  –Call Sirocco? Lunch? Coffee? Dinner? Movie?

  –Clean lab

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 3

  Which passions could become a new job?

  1. Food, duh, since apparently it’s all I do.

  2. Professional food critic?

  3. My own food truck/restaurant?

  4. Competitive eater? WTH?

  5. Get own cooking show? LOL?

  6. Stay sidekick for rest of life . . .

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 1

  Things I like about myself

  20. Not my job Kind

  21. Empathetic?

  22. Don’t abuse super power (not that it’s good for much but burning stuff and seeing through walls.)

  23. Moral? or is it Ethical?

  24. Restraint? (As in not punching Dr. L when he deserves it)

  25. Close enough.

  * * *

  To Do

  –Put off ordering monkeys for testing

  –Hook AGTG 5000 up to computer

  –Strip positron ray for parts (finally!)

  –SIROCCO LUNCH 1:00pm @ Khyber Pass

  –Test Dr. Lumos’ new Megastun gun and personal portable force field (not @ same time)

  –Rent tuxedo

  –Pick up Dr. L’s tux from dry cleaner

  –Super League United sponsorship gala

  –perform like trained seal @ gala

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 3

  7. I could own a dry cleaners. I spend enough time in them.

  8. Party planner?

  * * *

  To Do

  –call therapist

  –start patent process for Dr. Lumos’ Mega Stun gun

  –Put off ordering monkeys

  –Order

  –Hand sanitizer

  –rat bedding

  –bigger cages

  –more food

  Grocery list (me)

  –kobacha squash

  –acorn

  –zucchini

  –broccoli

  –cauliflower

  –kale

  –spinach

  –dandelion

  –watercress

  –chicken breast

  –chipotle

  –ginger

  –cayenne

  –chicken stock

  –onion

  –dried shiitaki

  –celery

  –coconut oil

  –lamb

  –green peppers

  –red peppers

  –mint tea

  Therapy

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 4

  Pros and Cons of working for Dr. L

  Pros

  –Fight crime

  –Do good

  –Use my powers for Good

  –meet other side kicks

  –fancy dinners

  –excitement

  –Keeps me in shape

  –Sometimes fun

  –Dr. Lumos isn’t worst hero to work for

  –Insurance w/full dental

  –good pay after taxes

  Cons

  –I have cleaned things I’ll never unsee.

  –not a lot of respect in side kicking

  –not much free time

  –terrible hours

  –meet other heroes

  –fancy dinners

  –Am too old to be called Heatboy

  –feel like glorified personal assistant

  –Dr. Lumos is batshit half the time

  –never got that cleaning robot promised 3 years ago

  –does not reimburse gas/travel expenses

  –Dr. Lumos never listens to me

  –no chance for advancement

  * * *

  To Do

  –ponder life choices

  –give police our statements in arrest of Lord Overdue

  –Press release

  –update Dr. Lumos’ Press Kit

  –Be here to sign for packages

  –Call Sirocco, ask to movies

  –gym

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 3

  My passions/hobbies

  9.The problem is I have no other skills other than side kicking. I’ve been doing it since I was 20.

  10. Eat self to death

  11. Cleaning/janitor

  * * *

  To Do

  –Order monkeys

  –set up new cages

  –open investigation on Chaos Queen

  –clean lab

  –plan Super League United’s charity benefit w/Carter and Sarah

  –find designer to rework Dr. L’s costume

  –Therapy

  –Movies w/Sirocco

  * * *

  Therapy Assignment 5

  If I could do anything, what would it be?

  1. chef???

  2. Write for food magazine

  3. Open a restaurant?

  4. Food critic

  5. Go to school for something? Chef school? Is it too late?

  6. Hero

  7. Retire to France?

  8. WTF?

  9. I don’t even know

  * * *

  To Do

  –call my accountant

  –meet Carter & Sarah

  –Call Sirocco (dinner date? Movie? Museum?)

  –finish setting up cages

  –Be here when electrician comes

  –gym

  * * *

  To Do

  –THERAPY

  –panic

  –quit job?

  –stake out Chaos Queen, bring corn chips, turkey jerky, seaweed, water/coffee, video camera w/zoom extra SD card

  * * *

  To Do

  –put out feelers for a new side kick for Dr. L

  –clean rat cages

  –Test personal force field (again–3rd time’s the charm I hope . . .)

  –Pick out invitation font for Super League benefit gala

  –work on seating chart

  –Be here when monkey shipment arrives

  –groceries me*see other list

  –groceries Dr. Lumos*see other list

  –Dry cleaning pickup–me

  –review submissions for Dr. L’s new costume

  * * *

  Therapy assignment 6:

  write a letter saying what you really want

  to say but DO NOT mail it

  Dear Dr. Lumos,

  I have been your sidekick for 14 years and in that time I’ve fetched and carried and cleaned up your experiments, been experimented on a few times without my knowledge or consent. I think you are halfway to being a super villain and I don’t know what keeps you on the side of good.

  I’m tired of being a sidekick. I’m tired of making coffee and getting your groceries and running errands. I’m a middle aged man and I need a career and a life of my own. I’m not your secretary, I’m not your intern, (you’re just lucky that memory ray worked on the last one!), and I’m not your husband. And you STILL won’t reimburse for travel! You have any idea how much I spend on dry cleaning runs alone? No. Because you get to be the hero inventing whatever mad thing comes into your head, and taking down super villains and getting all the credit while I get to file all the fucking paper work and answer your fan mail.

  I quit! I fucking quit!

  P.S. OMG seriously burn this

  * * *

  Letter of resignation draft 1

  Dear Dr. Lumos,

  Effective immediately I would like to inform you of my intention to resign as your sidekick. Consider this my three wee
k notice.

  I have put out feelers for a replacement sidekick for you and received interest from LaShawna Perkins (technomancer) AKA Nix, Bobby Ruiz (can see all spectrums of light) AKA Nightvizion, and Brittany Carlson (can send any object thrown at her back 180 degrees) AKA Twister.

  I can arrange interviews with them as soon as is convenient.

  Sincerely,

  Sean Woodall/Heatboy

  * * *

  To Do

  –Sleep in!!!!

  –Not get groceries

  –Research chef schools

  –Research restaurateurs

  –call Sirocco/romantic dinner

  Return to Contents

  RIGHTMAN! LOSES THE FAITH

  Gary Cuba

  George Tucker—aka RIGHTMAN! to the common citizens of Megalopolis—arrived home late, flush with his crime-fighting victories that day. He hung his cape on the coat hook in the foyer, and tried to ignore the burnt-out light bulb in the overhead fixture. His wife Tess hadn’t gotten around to changing it out yet.

  He’d have done it himself, but he knew he’d make a mess out of it, just like with all the other delicate household chores he’d attempted in the past. George had no fine control over his muscles—including the big one inside his skull. In fact, he wasn’t even sure which way you turned a bulb to unscrew it. All in all, it was a recipe for disaster.

  Tess, dishrag in hand, sauntered from the kitchen and stood on her tiptoes to give him a big smooch on the lips. “My hero returns! Sit and wind down before dinner. I hope you don’t mind meatloaf leftovers again.”

  George groaned. Meatloaf again? He flopped down onto the threadbare living room sofa and flipped through the TV news channels, where he could watch the press coverage of his most recent exploits. While they never got things exactly right, he still basked in the glow of the recaps.